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Thomas Tighe
President of Direct Relief International
Recap of his speech to the Santa Barbara Council for Self-Esteem  01/21/05

Thomas has been arriving home after mid-night since the Southeast Asia Tsunami.  He didn't even have time to go to a free lunch after the meeting because of a multitude of letters that needed to be signed at Direct Relief International.  He said that he has been touched by the demonstration of "how much people care" (kindness is inspiring) and rewarded by his opportunity to help those in need (the response of others affects how we feel about ourselves).

 He really didn't want to speak about his own self-esteem.  In fact he was afraid to do so.  He had never spoken to a group about himself and felt very uncomfortable in doing so.  Yet, he did what he feared--a self-esteem enhancing action.  In doing so he was not only an example to the rest of us but also a picture of humility. 

Thomas asked many questions.  One of which was: "Is the perception of Self-Esteem enough?  If so, why do we hear about those whom we perceive to have it all--beauty, prosperity, fame and intelligence who end up dying of bulimia or suicide?  Is there pain from not having enough?  Is there a limit to how much one can have?  Does someone else’s success make me feel inadequate?  Does what others think of me affect my self-esteem?  Should it?  Thomas had the personal self-esteem to state: “I do not know.”

His belief is that Self-Esteem is rooted in our own set of values.  We must seek to learn what really matters to us in the time that we have on this earth.  He says that “Self-esteem is what defines you through that well informed audience that is yourself.”

A question was asked from the audience: “Mr. Tighe, How do you help others with their Self-Esteem?

With out a pause, his reply told us how he has developed his own self-esteem.  Thomas is respectful of others, candid, intellectually honest, he does his homework, is very responsible, and takes people on their own terms.  He listens and is a receptive audience.  He encourages others.  He does what he does to pay back what he has received.  Thomas Tighe is full of gratitude.

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